Image result for homesick image

I just wanted to write about this issue called, homesick. Well, what really homesick all about?
Homesick can be defined as a feeling of alone and sad because you are far from home. To tell the truth, I never live far away or separated from my parents and family for almost 18 years old I live in this world. When I got a chance to further study in UKM which located in Bangi, Selangor, I was very delighted and happy. Aside, it is far from my hometown in Kedah. I never had a homesickness syndrome throughout my years in UKM because I trained myself to not too. UKM was always my dream university since I was in primary school, influenced by the local novels. So, when I got a chance to pursue my degree here, why should I be sad, right? The most important thing is, my parents also never worried about me staying in another state because according to them I am an independent lady and a person who can fit to live anywhere she wants to live. Lol.. It means that I can survive wherever I go :))

But then, I saw a lot of my friends on social media post about them being homesick. I can understand if you feeling lonely and sad when you live/stay far away from your home, where your parents and family are BUT, I couldn't understand when they keep tweeting on Twitter, posting on Instagram or update a status on Facebook every single day without failed about being homesick. It is normal to feel that especially if this is your first time to separate with your parents, just not to write about it on all your social media every day. I mean, common guys...if your university still in Malaysia, still near your home, you should be thankful because you can go back to your home whenever you want or your parents will come to visit you...what about the other who's university in abroad? I clearly can't accept about you guys being homesick. We are already into the adult's world, so, we should act like one. Besides, it's already our three years in university soon to be a graduate, I think it's not appropriate to feel homesick anymore. If you can survive your first year living far from your parents then, it shouldn't be a big problem for another year... ain't? Guess, we are different in how we handle our emotion to not let us feeling down. I called my parents every night, texting them over the day and even WhatsApp them every hour. Hear their voices on the phone made me calm and happy for no reason. Sharing a lof of stuff with mama and abah, ask how their day are, what is mama's cook for today and laughing with them through the phone has made my day. I also missing my parents every day and whenever I feeling down into memory lane (cewah) haha, I will asking Allah to protect them, to take care of them for me, make them happy, healthy and joyous for every single day of their life. Instead of posted on social media, why not you guys ask Allah SWT, not in prayers only but in anywhere anytime you guys feel homesick.

I know, maybe by expressed in social media can make you happy..then, go ahead. I won't judge (Did I judge it on my post, no?) lol (^_^)v It just sometimes I feel annoying about it. Haha gues I am old already :p

P/S: It's not too late to wish Happy Labour Day to everyone. May we all will be richest in here and hereafter. By the way, do you guys hear the sounds of the bell marking my birthday is coming in a few days? hehe :))))

False Hope

Well, what do you know about False hope?

If according to urban dictionary, false hope is when you look forward to something that has a strong chance of not happening and you may or may not know it. According to me, false hope is when you feel something that it's yours to get but in the end, it's someone else, that is false hope and NO, I'm not talking a false hope in the relationship between men and women. Other than a relationship, we should know that false hope can come in a variety of form. For instance, false hope in an interview for a job or for industrial training (LI). I come to realise even the company calling you for god know how many times for your application but still it will not ensure you to get a place there. Why did you do this to me ??? I was very disappointed and sad 😔. Maybe, it's my fault too because I already set a high expectation after getting calls from your company. But still, you shouldn't give me a false hope at the first place and y'know what, there is a saying that 'false hope is worse than despair' and you giving me that right now. I am beyond hurt. I keep coming to the office back and forth to check whether I already get an offer letter from your company or not, hours by hours checking my mail to see an email from your HR but no, I didn't get any single notification from your side even though I already sent a mail to ask regarding this issue to your HR. I feel anxious and nervous. To make it worst, I even had a dream about it. Tsk that show how hard I'm thinking about a placement for doing the internship.

Despite that, I will stay positive and by next week if I still do not get any email from your HR then I should give up on your company. Next, aim for one of the broadcasting company in this country. Don't give me any false hope anymore, guys because I might not know whether I can face it for second times or not because every rose has its thorn. May Allah lead us to the right path as He is the best planner after all. InshaAllah, God is enough for us and how excellent a Guardian He is - 3:173 💮

For now, I will remain calm and control my composure at my best state I can. Pray for my internship placement guys. I really need everyone's du'a.

Hire me because if you do not hire me, see, I have 7 dwarfs to help me. Lol I'm a very dedicated person :))) 

P/s: I'm having my first false hope syndrome at this moment because of you guys!!! 😢. 

Just Because

I just thinking about something when these words came across my mind :

"Jangan kejam dengan diri sendiri"

or in another words it means

''Don't be cruel to yourself''

I still clearly remember where that quotes came from. A few years ago, I read a malay novel but forgot the title and the author wrote this saying because the male character in the novel facing a really huge problem. He said this to his friend in which literally mean that he don't want to hurt himself anymore. Where enough is enough, stop this suffer imeddiately.

And I'm not at my weakest point yet. Even I fall, I still manage to stand up. I have very high self motivation. Whenever I am in the worst state of my life, I, Aalia Shahira will still shining as diamonds should shine. These words just to remind me that whatever happen in your life, don't ever ever thinking to be cruel to myself. Sometimes we tend to hurt ourself rather than hurting others. Kononnye, nak jaga hati orang tapi hati sendiri yang rabak . Lol tak payah nak baik sangat. Zaman sekarang kalau kau buat baik pon, orang senang pijak dan perkudakan kau. Better kau jaga diri sendiri dengan sebaik mungkin dari manusia-manusia spesies begitu. So, I have decided, I ONLY HAVE ONE HEART and I DON'T WANT TO HURT MY HEART until bleeding just because of someone else. Self love is important - Note to others. Orang selalu cakap perempuan ni lemah. Putus cinta sikit, perempuanlah yang paling merana manakala para lelaki memulakan langkah panjang meneruskan aktiviti mempermainkan perempuan. I didn't say all man, a few, and not all women are pious (tak termasuk pisau cukur, homewrecker dan seangkatan dengannya). Jadi, kalau putus cinta, I cadangkan para wanita untuk bertukar menjadi seorang yang cekal dan berkeyakinan. Jangan ingat sorang laki tinggalkan kita takkan ada lelaki lain yang baik pula. Ramai lelaki baik. I pun ingat dulu takde dah lelaki baik sebab I percaya dengan ayat "all good guy are taken". Ramai lelaki baik I kenal dan minat semua dah berbini so that's why boleh terfikir begitu. Ada je lelaki baik cuma kita tak jumpa lagi. Husnuzon akak-akak semua ye. Jap, apa I melalut cakap soal patah hati cintalah apalah padahal I (read: serious) tak pernah bercinta sepanjang duapuluhtiga tahun hidup. Ohh takk I cuma nak bagi contoh yang mudah sebab kita biasa kejam dengan diri sendiri sebab cinta sometimes. 

Oleh itu, kalau korang berada dalam masalah yang besar ke, putus cinta ke, apa ke, stop hurting and stop being cruel to yourself. Mengadu pada Tuhan dulu, minta petunjuk and calm yourself. Bila hati tenang, fikiran pun tenang, InshaAllah everything gonna be fine and alright. Allah pun tak kejam dengan kita, kenapa kita perlu kejam dengan diri sendiri kan ? I pon sometimes macam tu juga tapi satu benda yang I selalu buat I akan cakap dengan diri sendiri takpun dengan diding ke just to sort off my problem and y'know what ? Magically, I feel better after that. I senyum, tarik nafas dan yesssss let's live your life to the fullest, I told my self.

Jadi, I tinggalkan korang dengan gambar I zaman freshie di UKM sambil berfikir, ' ermm ada tak lelaki kat Malaysia ni muka macam Christos Cholidis yang very the hunk tu ? '

P/s: Kejam dengan diri sendiri pon tak boleh, apatah lagi kejam dengan orang lain. Treat others as you want them to treat you  ❤