False Hope

Well, what do you know about False hope?

According to Urban Dictionary, false hope is when you look forward to something that has a strong chance of not happening and you may or may not know it. For me, false hope is when you feel something that it's yours to get but in the end, it's someone else, that is false hope and NO, I'm not talking about false hope in the relationship between men and women. Other than a relationship, we should know that false hope can come in a variety of forms. For instance, false hope in an interview for a job or for industrial training (LI). I come to realize even if the company calls you god knows how many times for your application still it will not ensure you get a place there. Why did you do this to me ??? I was very disappointed and sad 😔. Maybe, it's my fault because I already set high expectations after getting calls from their company. But still, they shouldn't have given me false hope in the first place and y'know what, there is a saying that 'false hope is worse than despair' and you are giving me that right now. I am beyond hurt. I kept coming to the office back and forth to check whether I had already gotten an offer letter from that company or not, hours by hours checking my mail to see an email from HR but no, I didn't get any single notification from their side even though I already sent an email regarding this issue to the HR. I feel anxious and nervous. To make it worse, I even had a dream about it. Tsk that shows how hard I'm thinking about my placement for the internship.

Despite that, I will stay positive and by next week if I still do not get any email from their HR then I should give up on that company. Next, aim for one of the broadcasting companies in this country. Don't give me any false hope anymore, guys because I might not know whether I can face it for a second time or not because every rose has its thorn. May Allah lead us to the right path as He is the best planner after all. InshaAllah, God is enough for us and how excellent a Guardian He is - 3:173 💮

For now, I will remain calm and control my composure in the best state I can. Pray for my internship placement guys. I really need everyone's du'a.

Hire me because if you do not hire me, see, I have 7 dwarfs to help me. Lol, I'm a very dedicated person :))) 

P/s: I'm having my first false hope syndrome at this moment because of you guys!!! 😢. 

Just Because

I just thinking about something when these words came across my mind :

"Jangan kejam dengan diri sendiri"

in other words, it means

''Don't be cruel to yourself''

I still clearly remember where those quotes came from. A few years ago, I read a Malay novel but forgot the title and the author wrote this saying because the male character in the novel faced a really huge problem. He said this to his friend which literally means that he doesn't want to hurt himself anymore. Where enough is enough, stop this suffering immediately.

And I'm not at my weakest point yet. Even if I fall, I still manage to stand up. I have a very high self motivation. Whenever I am in the worst state of my life, I, Aalia Shahira will still shining as diamonds should shine. These words just to remind me that whatever happen in your life, don't ever ever thinking to be cruel to myself. Sometimes we tend to hurt ourself rather than hurting others. Kononnye, nak jaga hati orang tapi hati sendiri yang rabak . Lol tak payah nak baik sangat. Zaman sekarang kalau kau buat baik pon, orang senang pijak dan perkudakan kau. Better kau jaga diri sendiri dengan sebaik mungkin dari manusia-manusia spesies begitu. So, I have decided, I ONLY HAVE ONE HEART and I DON'T WANT TO HURT MY HEART until bleeding just because of someone else. Self love is important - Note to others. Orang selalu cakap perempuan ni lemah. Putus cinta sikit, perempuanlah yang paling merana manakala para lelaki memulakan langkah panjang meneruskan aktiviti mempermainkan perempuan. I didn't say all man, a few, and not all women are pious (tak termasuk pisau cukur, homewrecker dan seangkatan dengannya). Jadi, kalau putus cinta, I cadangkan para wanita untuk bertukar menjadi seorang yang cekal dan berkeyakinan. Jangan ingat sorang laki tinggalkan kita takkan ada lelaki lain yang baik pula. Ramai lelaki baik. I pun ingat dulu takde dah lelaki baik sebab I percaya dengan ayat "all good guy are taken". Ramai lelaki baik I kenal dan minat semua dah berbini so that's why boleh terfikir begitu. Ada je lelaki baik cuma kita tak jumpa lagi. Husnuzon akak-akak semua ye. Jap, apa I melalut cakap soal patah hati cintalah apalah padahal I (read: serious) tak pernah bercinta sepanjang duapuluhtiga tahun hidup. Ohh takk I cuma nak bagi contoh yang mudah sebab kita biasa kejam dengan diri sendiri sebab cinta sometimes. 

Oleh itu, kalau korang berada dalam masalah yang besar ke, putus cinta ke, apa ke, stop hurting and stop being cruel to yourself. Mengadu pada Tuhan dulu, minta petunjuk and calm yourself. Bila hati tenang, fikiran pun tenang, InshaAllah everything gonna be fine and alright. Allah pun tak kejam dengan kita, kenapa kita perlu kejam dengan diri sendiri kan ? I pon sometimes macam tu juga tapi satu benda yang I selalu buat I akan cakap dengan diri sendiri takpun dengan diding ke just to sort off my problem and y'know what ? Magically, I feel better after that. I senyum, tarik nafas dan yesssss let's live your life to the fullest, I told my self.

Jadi, I tinggalkan korang dengan gambar I zaman freshie di UKM sambil berfikir, ' ermm ada tak lelaki kat Malaysia ni muka macam Christos Cholidis yang very the hunk tu ? '

P/s: Kejam dengan diri sendiri pon tak boleh, apatah lagi kejam dengan orang lain. Treat others as you want them to treat you  ❤

Wordless Wednesday

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Credit Photos: Google (of course)